Thursday, December 18, 2008
Good to go
I had my preop testing and everything is good to go. The paperwork is all done. I just have to show up at 5:00 Tuesday morning. Things have been really tough the last several days. For those of you who follow this, I'm sorry I've not posted. I've not felt like doing much of anything. I have gone from wanting to eat everything, to not wanting to eat at all. From very excited, to very depressed. From surgery can't get here soon enough, to I'm going to call and cancel surgery. I can't even begin to put words on the things that have been going through my head. This has got to be the hardest thing I've done in my life... and I'm sure its only going to get harder. I've decided if it was just mental, it would be ok. If it was just physical, it would be ok. But it is very much both, and the combination is horrible. I'm sure the end results will be worth it, and that's what I'm keeping my eyes on. Thankfully I'm within site of the surgery now. In 5 days my whole life will change forever. I just can't even really comprehend the whole thing. It can be very overwhelming. I just ask anyone who is reading this to keep me and my family in your thoughts and prayers. It will be hard on all of us. See you all tomorrow. Steph
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Stephanie,
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting. I am sure you are having a lot of emotions. From the far left and far right of the scale and everywhere in between. I remember a lot of days with Steven- some of what you are saying brings back a lot of memories. I am here to support you and I will keep you in my thoughts. The one thing you need to remember is that I can't help unless I know. BLOGGING is very important for you to do right now... it is just like journaling and will help you. It will also help me help you.
Love and Hugs,
Christy